Thursday, February 5, 2009

Remembering.......

"The courage to face the road that has been traveled...
to receive the lessons of what has been...
invites the soul to embrace the journey that beckons ahead...
the gentle hope of what can be"


I was looking through images of work I had created a couple years ago and came across these two pieces. They reminded me of a different season of prolific creativity in my life. It seems it is good to remember. When you are risking heading around a new bend, and cannot see exactly where you are going, its encouraging to remember where you have been. We see so much farther and clearer when we turn around and take a moment to see with eyes that understand more now, have experienced more, a heart that trusts a little more...maybe is even a little wiser. I don't feel as afraid of letting my creativity ebb and flow as I use to...the fear that it all might wither and dry up and never return doesn't haunt me. Though my studio is more often quiet and less productive these days...I have come to understand that my creative energy moves, morphs, evolves and flows into many different areas of my life. I have learned to take it with me as the wind shifts and new steps are revealed.

I will never forget a dear woman who sat with me over coffee one day...many years ago...before I had begun to sell artwork or journey down this path I have now been on as a collage artist...a road that has now become somewhat familiar and safe to me. She was looking over several healing-themed collages I had created and framed. She stood up and one by one layed each piece around the floor. We stood in the middle of all of them in silence. I was unsure, feeling very vulnerable as these pieces felt like opening a secret cavern in my soul that felt so raw and vulnerable. I remember I was facing some risky steps in my own journey and was afraid this "art thing" was a freak occurance...a one time deal...that I could create any more collages seemed unlikely. I knew I was going to have to put my heart energy into some difficult personal work that would take me away from formally creating artwork that others would see...for a season...and into a secluded season of letting decades of secrets spill out through art that would ultimately be for my own eventual healing and freedom. She asked if she could pray for me, held my hand and put her fingers gently over the inside of my wrist...as if to take my pulse...and then she said these words...."as long as your heart is beating, as this blood pulsates through your body, God's gift to you of your creativity will continue to flow and give life through every nerve and fiber of your being , from within you out into the hearts of those who are hurting. You can trust the source and that the gift is neverending."

Remembering her words are a comfort to me today as I move into new places. They are a reminder all these years later of where I have been...of where I can travel again if I choose. My heart is still beating and the blood is still moving. So today I encourage you to stop for a moment and remember the road you have traveled. Gather the strength born out of the insight received from what was and let it give you courage and hope for the unknown road called " what will be". The truth is all of these moments and experiences and choices and paths are intricately connected and linked together by One who has all our days in His hands. Don't be afraid to lie still and be hidden for awhile while the new path emerges. Just remember you'll will find your gift,your creativity, your passion...safely tucked away in your heart and beating through every fiber of your being...nourishing every aspect of your soul. Like the butterfly...the time will come...when resurrected together in its new form...fresh strength and vision will be pushed through your wings and the flight will feel almost effortless.

5 comments:

My Journey to Hope said...

What a beautiful prayer your friend prayed over you...and so true. It is good to remember. It helps the hope grow in us. And I love the first piece in this post. Your work is so inspiring to me. I hope I can find a way to express through art the way you do.

-Michelle

Lisa said...

Beautiful words of wisdom, Lani. It is a pleasure and an honor to witness your path.

My Journey to Hope said...

Thanks for sharing your heart. I know God gives us a desire for something for a reason, and I know that there are seasons in our lives. I'm in a difficult, foundational place right now, but I know it will get better.

I pray that those desires in your heart would be fulfilled- that you will find others to journey with you in music. Keep writing, keep singing, keep doing art (as I tell you, I am reminding me). Beautiful things are being awakened and brought into existence. New life! I pray it for us all!

-Michelle

Renee said...

This, for me, was a wonderful post. We have to take time, we have to reflect, we have to believe, and we have to have hope.

Renee

Valerianas Studio said...

What a wonderful and encouraging post!

Thank you for sharing your journey and your experiences. I deeply admire your artwork, and find it very inspiring.

Valeriana :-)